Bittersweet

At the Taoyuan International Airport now... Got here in plenty of time... Too much anxiety so I just wanted to get here... Sit in quietness and refresh the mind for when I see Mom... Thanks to Jewel, Lyn, Shaun and David for taking me out for a little bit - dinner and a stroll at Warner/Mitsukoshi area...

Taking in the lights, the live entertaients and enjoying the night air... Though it was all fun and exciting, it was still quite hard to keep smiling when my heart and my thoughts are already in Manila... In wanting to see Mom and see what I can do for her now... Just to somehow alleviate her of pain.. Even just a bit... As happy as I am to be getting to her soon - am also Sad and Scared as to what is to come...

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This afternoon when i was talking to my Mom, in her mumbly voice, i could make her out saying: " it's Christmas time, but I do not feel it.". I guess, even without me telling her so, we share the same sentiments... Check in counter opening soon... Am in live with sp many others - i ca see all their excitement and happiness as they will be with love ones soon to celebrate this festive season... Am smiling but I can only wish I share their sentiments...